SLOWMOTO [Ep. 11] - Hot Diggedy Doh
• Written by JeffyDaRapper
JeffyDaRapper's Notes
Finally, some half-episodic shenanigans for once! lol
Oh yeah, Episode 10 did release, I just forgot to put the text in a new rap so it would be in the explore section.
Also, you'll finally see a character that I've neglected for a long time, Braxton... Where has he been during this entire charade?
(and yeah it's implied no one knew about his fate or cared ig lol)
// Somewhere at the Disney World suites, Mickey has commanded his guys to do something about Mark and...
// Donald Duck then does a butt kick to knock Mark out.
Mickey: Why did you just use your butt to knock him out??
Donald: My buttocksus is Jesus!
Mickey: What..
Goofy: MICKEY, TAKE THIS!
// Goofy throws an entire anchor through the front door for some reason with Mickey and Donald dodging at the nick of time, with it narrowly missing Mark's unconscious body.
Mickey: GOOFY, WHAT THE HELL??
Goofy: I knew you need it!
Mickey: Where the fuck did you get that whole-ass anchor??
Goofy: I saved it for emergencies, uhk-yuh.
Donald: Goofy, we didn't need your whole-assff, I already used mines.
Goofy: Your ass really smells like poop.
Donald: No it doesfn't. I wiped'a.
Goofy: Well something in here REALLY smells like poop.
Mickey: Let's just get the kid...
// They didn't have to go too far in the suite, as Drawing Jeffy sees them and approaches them.
Drawing Jeffy: Pff-hht! Am JEFFIS!
Goofy: Hi Jeffis.
Donald: Jeffisfffsfsfsfsfsf.
Drawing Jeffy: Ya that mah full name, Jeffisfsfsfsfsfsffsf..
Mickey: Okay okay, Donald, stop making noises at him. And you.. Damn, I forgot how fucking ugly you look!
Goofy: Well that ain't nice..
Drawing Jeffy: Ugly? Iz dat a type-a mayonnaise?
Mickey: You could say that..
Donald: Mayonnaissffe.
Mickey: Donald, stop that!
Donald: What? It'ssf-fun to pronouncse!
Mickey: You don't need to show off your godawful lisp. We get it.
Drawing Jeffy: List? List of uhhh mayonnaise??
Mickey: Uh..
Drawing Jeffy: I gots a mayonnaise cap on mah head!
Mickey: Okay, before this goes nowhere.. Drawing Jeffy. That's your name, right?
Drawing Jeffy: Noooo, it Jeffisfffsfsfsfsfsf..
Mickey: Alright I get that! But uh, we're here to pick you up and take you back to your real family.
Drawing Jeffy: My.. real familee?
Mickey: Yeah! With the guy who.. I think created you? What was his name? Jeff?
Goofy: I think his name was also Jeffy, but yeah.
Drawing Jeffy: JEFF-EEE! AH NEED TO SEE HIM!
Mickey: That's the spirit! Now, it's gonna be a long car ride to Pensacola. Hope you don't mind.
Goofy: We could just fly there..
Mickey: Goofy, it's in the same state. We can't just waste time on the airport.
Goofy: Well don't go blamin' me when I get carsick!
Donald: I'm allerg-HIC to carsssf!
Mickey: How??
Donald: I'm racist.
Mickey: Jesus Christ.. Well if you wanna hang back so much, guys, I guess I'll drive him alone!
Goofy: Nah, take me with you! Donald annoying, I don't like him when you ain't here.
Donald: Fuck you!
Drawing Jeffy: HA HA! Fuck! HA HA!
Mickey: So Donald, you gonna hang back?
Donald: Might as-zz well.
// Mickey, Goofy, and Drawing Jeffy get out of Disney World and go in Mickey's car from his reserved spot in the parking lot. They drive off.
Goofy: So Mickey.. do you think we should've called da CEOs n' stuff before we do this?
Mickey: I already told you they wouldn't care. Minnie and Donald can look after everything just fine.
Drawing Jeffy: UHHH! Donald Drumpfs! Epstain PUSSY!
Goofy: Mickey, I think I'm already regretting takin' the car ride.
Mickey: Then just don't talk. Ignore him.
Goofy: You sure we couldn't have just taken da bus?
Mickey: No..
Goofy: Then- Then, I could at least talk to people I think I would like. He smells like poop.
Mickey: Really now?
Goofy: In his pants. I smell it. It really smells like poop, I tell you.
Mickey: Why are you always going out of your way to smell poop?
Goofy: Because I can't help it. My sense of smell.
Mickey: Then roll your window down!
Goofy: Alright, geez, uhk-yuh..
// Goofy rolls the window down.
Mickey: We haven't even drove 50 miles and you wanna make a show of everything.
Drawing Jeffy: A show?! I wanna watch Spunchbop!
Mickey: (At least Donald isn't here.. But things would be so much easier if Minnie came..)
// But then, halfway to Pensacola, they run into a snag..
// Someone bumps into them a bit hard when they're at a stop sign.
Mickey: Oh- JESUS CHRIST!
Goofy: Whoa, that was hard!
Drawing Jeffy: BIG PENIS.
Goofy: It as hard as a solid shit, that how hard it is..
Mickey: Just shut up, okay, I'm gonna go see who's the douchebag that rear-ended us..
// Mickey puts it on park, gets out of the car, and sees a familiar, unexpected face.. Braxton.
Braxton: Holy shit! Sorry man, I ain't drive much these days!
Mickey: You look.. No wait, I don't think I know you. Must just be the voice.
Braxton: You're.. MICKEY MOUSE?!
Mickey: Yeah man.
Braxton: I'm so so SO sorry Mickey Mouse! I didn't mean to bump your car! Please don't do a class action lawsuit or some shit! I didn't mean it!
Mickey: Hmm..
// Mickey looks at the dents on his bumper.
Mickey: Well that's good at least. You're lucky there aren't any huge dents or cracks on it. It'd be cheap for me to fix.
Braxton: Phew.. Oh, and what are you doin' out here?
Mickey: (Should I tell this guy in particular?)
Braxton: Wait, you goin' to Pensacola, right??
Mickey: Yes.. How did you know?
Braxton: I swear I kept seeing your car, you were goin' in the same direction I was. Then I sped up a bit, hit you by accident, and yeah.
Mickey: Oh! So are you perhaps one of our active customers? The Junior kid?
Braxton: Yeah, that's my son! What a holy coincidence!! You see, I actually died.
Mickey: Oh okay, wait what??
Braxton: Yeah, that pencil nose retard killed me! But it don't matter, I have strange memories of being killed before. Not fun being killed though. That shit hurt.
Braxton: I went up the fire exit of Hell right? Yeah I was in Hell for some reason, I didn't do nothing, I swear! But it was like, far from my house, which was bullshit times twenty! That's why I drive all the way there.
Mickey: (Pencil nose kid? Killing that guy? I know it's not Drawing Jeffy, but still, something weird may be going on. Weirder than anticipated...)
Mickey: Sorry you died man. That must've sucked.
Braxton: Right?!
Mickey: Hey, you seem pretty cool. We could keep going and you could meet us back there. I believe you do live there after all.
Braxton: Oh yeah I do. Watchin' Charleyyy and shit.
Mickey: (Ugh, I hate that guy.. I hate Laugh Box TV. They rip us off!)
Mickey: Well alright then, I'll get back in my car. Don't wanna hold up the road any longer ey?
Braxton: Yeah, let's go.
// Braxton and Mickey both go back in their cars. They start driving again.
Goofy: Yo, who was that?
Mickey: Apparently a guy who actually lives in that Pensacola residence!
Goofy: Oh shit really??
Mickey: Yeah.
Goofy: Why he bump into us? Uhk-yuh?
Mickey: He was speeding a bit, and apparently he doesn't drive much.
Goofy: Is he asian?
Mickey: No??
Drawing Jeffy: AHM A CRAZY RICH ASIAN!
Mickey: No, he's not fucking asian, and let's just drive. Anyone can be bad drivers.
Goofy: Yeah.. but according to da statisti-
Drawing Jeffy: AUTISTIC GUACAMOLE!
Goofy: Hey, I was tryin' to talk!
Drawing Jeffy: UH!
Goofy: Anyway, is that guy gonna meet with us?
Mickey: Well obviously. Would be courteous of us to reunite them with him.
Goofy: I don't wanna go to court ever again. They make me pay childs support.
Mickey: Yeah well, you probably deserve it.
Goofy: No I don't! I'm a good daddy!
Drawing Jeffy: DADDY IS TOOF FAIRY!
Goofy: Yeah, what he said!
Mickey: (I'm gonna be so glad when this is over with...)
// TO BE CONTINUED!!11
