I Hate You [2023]

People keep telling me that it’s fucked up to hate,

But I can’t keep this anger in me anymore today,

Cuz I’ve already laid down my life away, I cry in pain,

My tears won’t dry away, it sucks that I invite this dang;

Sour grown ass bitch in my life, it eats me alive,

I’m exhausted, brain is fried, sleep at night

With the lights on, keep trying to find the right song

To take my mind off you getting me into a tight spot;

And if there’s one thing that I learned,

Is that you suck, think that would hurt?

Pound my eardrums, rematch occurs,

Hitting me once, be mad and burn;

You to the ground, watch you get up to chase me down,

Then we fight all through the house,

And then Mom would only see how

It was always me being bad, and always you that made her proud;

 

So don’t ask me why I would hate you,

I hope demons come and take you,

I hope someone comes out to rape you,

I hope you get shipped without a label;

 

My sister always had the upper hand,

So many things that she wants to plan,

Little me could never understand

Why I always had to suffer then;

One time me and her were gonna go see a movie,

But something happened where we couldn't go, she was moody,

Then she wanted to reschedule sometime and try again,

Till I found out she went without me to see it with her friend!;

Since I was in first grade, I had the worst days,

It turns into a rollercoaster that were made

From this girl, who loved seeing me in trouble,

Snitch and tattletale and feeding me the struggle;

And once I use my muscles to shove her,

She starts crying and run off to our mother,

Who was sick of me being a goddamn sour brother,

Slapped me with a belt, now here comes another;

It was like her main goal was to see me in pain,

Y'all must be thinking this isn't the reason to hate,

Sick of hearing my mom screaming my name,

When in most of the time with sis, she was to blame!;

 

So don’t ask me why I would hate you,

I hope demons come and take you,

I hope someone comes out to rape you,

I hope you get shipped without a label;

 

So after you caused me some grief, I never was the same,

I developed anger and hatred, and it stayed locked in my brain,

Forcing me to listen to music that you like,

Get offended when I’m honest, like I should lie?;

You act like I’m supposed to thank you for your protection,

When all you did was made me feel helplessness, detention,

I’m sick of living in the dark with you, couldn’t get out,

And once I did, your shadow chased me that you set out;

How you sat back, and you laughed at me getting hurt,

Always in my business just to spread the word,

Thinking that you’re wiser than me, are you sure?

Your ass dropped out of college and now you’re stuck;

And your friends putting shit in your head while you’re drunk,

Fucking bunched up and then clutched up lovers,

Turning bisexual, I bet you though, when I discovered

That you disrespected Mom, you’re lucky I didn’t sucker-

Punch you in the face, I'm going back to my old ways

But after the days I started making the smile on my face

Disappear for good, erase the great disaster moments of pain,

And pave the way for my future without you in my place;

Don’t tell me about tough bitch, I was in it,

I got my chin hit on the edge of a staircase from this dickhead,

Who picked me and threw me down and had me cry for six minutes,

Enough tears to clean the dishes you pile up after dinner;

You think that im suppose to forgive and love you after that?

I'm a sinner, fuck you. And I'm saying you don't matter for crap,

Never realized that I had autism, it's just a bunch of

Fucking trust that's now thrown under the bus, im done!;

Glad you couldn’t make it at my graduation,

Didn’t need your celebration, I need fucking meditation,

You won't control me anymore, I’m much stronger,

So Mom please don’t make me try to get along with;

Her because I can’t forgive someone who felt the need to

Be so mean to me as evil, at the time you couldn’t see through,

Had an argument where she wasn’t even involved in,

Which is what started my distance from her wrong shit;

And she got so mad that she was close to smacking me

With a fucking hanger, and I wish she did just whack me,

Cuz I know I would've grabbed her, threw this trash girl,

Out the fucking window for a car to crash into her;

So this is my send off to this fucking stupid dumbass bitch,

I don’t care if we’re siblings, I hope you rot in hell you fucking bitch,

I hope I never see your face more hideous then it already is you fucking bitch,

I mean what I say cuz it’s been like this for 20+ years you fucking bitch;

 

So don’t ask me why I would hate you,

I hope demons come and take you,

I hope someone comes out to rape you,

I hope you get shipped without a label;