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POEM (Rewritten) - When I Die

  1. When I die, I don’t want a funeral
  2. I don’t want a meaningless array, of things you all “wanted to say”
  3. That you never said to my face not during one single day when I was alive
  4. I spent time being wise, with others asking for my valuable advice
  5. Because they know I’ll articulate in a way that’s extremely precise and also, I never lie
  6. Everyone I knew erased me and disgraced me, not once did they ever embrace me
  7. Just shamed me, made me a target then vehemently aimed at me
  8. The flame I keep causes pain that seeps and stains my sleeves with blood.
  9. So, when I die, I don’t want a funeral.
  10. I don’t want that mediocre speech, you can save it all in fact please,
  11. None of your cliches or theories, when my life was a simply tragic series so I insist,
  12. That you keep it concrete if I supposedly mean a damn thing to you or I’ll scream.
  13. Because it seems to me everybody is only my friend if it benefits them, if it leaks
  14. Excellence to them but no evidence to them when they kill me with their words
  15. So save it, brave it, don’t speak on my death like you loved me and it hurts
  16. So when I die, no, I don’t want a funeral
  17. I don’t care for a display of emotions that are fake, acting like my death was a mistake
  18. But not a soul never stayed when I told you how much my heart ached, and realistically,
  19. I should not expect those people to kindly behave when I was raised in such ways
  20. That cause me to over explain like a moron and make me feel weird and strange
  21. Even when I’m polite, honest and it’s valid I’m still told I just act deranged, and so,
  22. When I die, I don’t want a funeral
  23. Because not once did I feel safe, like I ever had a place to escape to
  24. When I needed it the most and was faced with the host my fate almost served
  25. Because I’m almost certainly cursed…
  26. Not once did I have a place to escape to…
  27. To run straight to… that I never had to hesitate through
  28. You all left my on my own and the loyalties have been shown to me
  29. It’s not closure it’s not meaningful to me and it’s not necessary, so
  30. When I die, I don’t want a funeral.
  31. If you respect me you’d also respect my preference, at least I would hope
  32. But, “hope is a fools game” was one of many of my quotes,
  33. If you feel a need to honour knowing me then smoke weed in some scenic clothes
  34. Because the concept of me ever wanting the the hot seat is a hoax,
  35. And beyond the mortal coil I’m not a guardian angel, I’m just a not so friendly ghost
  36. A spirit floating and hosting the tension of attempting a lifetime of composure,
  37. So when I die, I don’t want a funeral.
  38. I don’t want my death to get you a week off work or studies,
  39. Maybe help you pull some honeys, general clout chasing behaviour that gets you little buddies
  40. And besides your brownie points that service just ain’t worth the money,
  41. I don’t care for it I’m not there for it especially if I’m six feet under and I want to swear on it
  42. That if you don’t obey this wish and make a spectacle of it I will motherfucking haunt you.
  43. Like a rare onyx amongst pebbles, and I am just a rock, so
  44. When I die,
  45. I don’t want a funeral.

Lyrics added by KarmaViciosa

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