Thinking
• Written by Lucidus
Lucidus's Notes
This song is what I think about on the daily my thinking goes into a deep thought so it's hard to come out of
Like when I hold my breath when I drown in thoughts
But these thoughts helps me with my songs
When my mind start to fall apart
When it's thinking wrong I keep in thought
I'm not the only one that's falling off
So I think, keeping me in check
I think it's for the best when I stay in check
When I start to think I think I start to lack
It's like my mind been pricked with a tack
It's like my mind has been hacked and it's hard to think
It's hard to think
I'm just thinking about the life I live
Thinking the life I have I should quit
The songs I make they some shit
All I can say is, life's a bitch
I'm having a hard time thinking
I feel like sinking into the other side
Thinking I should fucking die
I don't want to be alive
I'm tired of writing in my notepad and crying
To tell you the truth but everybody thinks I'm lying
Everybody thinks I'm whining by things I'm putty on this paper but I'm just trying
To rap about things without hiding my feelings that are kindness
They say this is a sadness I think it's a sickness
They say I'm a virus and I'm still tryna find Jesus
The feelings I have hidden when I said this is a illness
The courage I am building so this red liquid won't be spilling
Out of my arm but I'm serious
Everybody telling me I need the cannabis
How y'all cannot fuck with this
I just get delirious when artist talk about the shit I'm in
Have you notice the shit I'm in
Depression how can I live with this
I'm serious you don't know what the purpose is
To kill myself this is the emptiness talking isn't it obvious
I'm just thinking about this shit
Do you think I need the medicine
I'm just thinking about the life I live
Thinking the life I have I should quit
The songs I make they some shit
All I can say is, life's a bitch
Even though it's a hard time thinking
My thinking has me chasing
Depression like we are dating
Tickle it so it keeps on singing
Call it but I keep on thinking
If it keeps on calling me
How can I ignore it
If it keeps on robbing dreams
How can I restore it
And it has me thinking what am I doing
If I keep on thinking like this how can I move on
My thoughts have shoes on
Ready to charge at any giving moment
I can't leave it held back for to long
These sins I made may turn me into a serpent and leave me burning
Like my veins when I cut my skin open
Or my brain when these thoughts start flowing
I try to keep these thoughts chained up but I can't hold it
It's killing me inside but you don't know it
I try to be happy at times but then I'm sober
I try to think happy thoughts but the thought of me and this notepad is over
Makes me mad then I start writing again then I'm sober
What are these songs for in case this life is over
What are these thoughts for if I'm writing them down I'm hoping
These thoughts goes away cause I've chosen
Death but I'm still moping
I'm just thinking about the life I live
Thinking the life I have I should quit
The songs I make they some shit
All I can say is, life's a bitch
My thinking is enough to put me in the hospital alone
But will I execute the idea or try to get help
Depression is like PTSD when things remind of bad things
You just go into a state where you want to be left alone
But everybody has it different like me music is my love
It's my one desire to live if you take that away from me
I have no one that's gonna listen to me
Music is for me to release what I'm thinking
So this me
Illusions coming soon
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About the Artist
Lucidus
Member since July 13 2017