REDROOMS

[Intro]

This one man, it's different

When those little things build up

And you let them go

But the tiniest thing just make you blow up

Can you relate?

 

[Verse One]

The hallway light was buzzin' like it knew I wasn't sleeping

Three in the morning hear the neighbours bed creaking

Dust on the windowsill and the kettle still screechin'

And every little thing feels loud when your head weakens

I've been countin' all the cracks in the paint above the bedframe

Bills folded underneath the keyboard with the dead names

Unread texts from my mother sayin' "call me when your head straight"

How am I supposed to answer when I don't recognize my own face?

Walked to the store just to stand inside the freezer aisle

Cold air hit my skin and made me stay a while

Cashier asked how I'm doing so I forced another smile

Funny how a stranger notice pain before your people dial

Cos' lately every room get darker when i step in it

Friends consoling but their words sound like an estimate

Sink full of dishes and I swear they look sediment

These small failures turn to mountains when you measure it

And I don't yell much, I absorb it

Bottle every broken conversation in my organs

Every fake "I'm good" every night I couldn't afford rent

Every dream I watched die slow while everybody gone spent

The one day it happen subtle as a nosebleed

Missed call from my favourite ex while the TV playin' old scenes

Somebody upstairs stomping you better call the police

And something in my chest finally broke without a warning

Now the walls are looking red and every sound got sharp edges

Hands shakin' in the bathroom light fighting dark seconds

Mirror saying "you became the thing you kept repressing"

I couldn't even tell if I was crying or just breathless

Yeah, the blinds force daylight, I just woke up in the afternoon

And my mind turning against me as I beat up the room

Like depression ain't a slow leak hiding in the tissues

'Til you wake up one day and every thought become an issue

And yeah, I know tomorrow I'm gonna prolly act normal again

Crack jokes

Help somebody else ignore all their sins like a tough bloke

But every time I try to help I just fail fucking miserably

So I dial my mama and she claims I'm doing perfectly

Fuck

 

[Pre-Chorus]

And if I fade again

Don't wait again

The lights all turn red in my head again

I tried my best

Still broke my chest

Now every little thing feel like the end

So raise your glass

To the nights I couldn't hold it in

Smile so people never notice it

Everybody got a version of a broken kid

Mine just learned to live inside the red rooms

 

[Chorus]

Red rooms

Red rooms

Every road lead back to red rooms

Head down

Can't move

Tryna outrun what I been through

 

[Verse Two]

The TV still glowing from the night before

Same clothes in the basket and my blood on the kitchen floor

Cupboards slam harder when your mind at war

Funny how the quiet makes a person hear their damage more

Phone ringing

I ignore it

Another "you been distant lately" conversation

Fuck it

Another person tryna fix me with their motivation

Like I ain't spent years fighting thoughts in the basement

And I was holdin' it together by a thread line

Fake laughs at work while my hands shook at the red-lights

People talkin' to me, swear to God it sounded dead-like

Like everybody livin normal while I'm barely getting by

Then it happened

Not daramatic like the movies are

No big crash

No sirens cutting through the room

Just one more bad day added to a hundred wounds

And something in me said "Fuck it, I got nothing left to lose"

I punched a hole straight through the bedroom wall

Stood there bleedin' watchin' pictures and the plaster fall

Breath gettin' shorter while the shadows stretch across the hall

I needa friend or a saviour for me to call

Now the sink runnin over and neighbours banging on the cieling

Voices in my head are louder than the television

Tryna calm down but my body never really listen

That's the scary part, you know it's wrong and still keep spiralling

Cos' once you hit that point, it ain't anger, it's exhaustion

Every little hurt you buried start distortin

All them nights you stayed silent feel important

Till the red rooms open up and you just walk in

 

[Bridge]

I looked into the mirror barely recognised the face

Eyes bloodshot, jaw locked, tears mixin' with the rage

And for a second I got terrified of what I'd became

Not because I snapped, because it felt normal for a day

 

[Pre-Chorus]

 

And when I break again

Don't call my name

The ceiling turns red when the pressure change

I held it down

Till I nearly drowned

Now every quiet night don't feel the same

So here's a toast

To the lies I kept behind my teeth

Eyes low so nobody worry 'bout me

Everybody got a side they never let you see

Mine just learned to hide inside the red rooms

 

[Chorus]

Red rooms

Red rooms

Every road lead back to red rooms

Head down

Can't move

Tryna outrun what I been through

 

[Bridge]

Now the house don't feel like home no more

Every mirror got a face I can't ignore

I hear my heartbeat through the bedroom floor

Like it's tryna warn me what I'm turnin' toward

And I tried

God knows I tried

To keep the light alive behind my eyes

But every small cut multiplied with time

Till there was nothin left of me inside

So if you see me driftin' through the dark

Don't follow me

Don't follow me

Cause once them red walls start closin' in

They never leave

They never leave

 

[Chorus]

 

Red rooms

Red rooms

Every road leads back to red rooms

Head down

Can't move

Tryna outrun what I been through

 

[Outro]

The red rooms hurt

They hurt so bad

After you let the rage out

It feels so normal

Hurts so bad

Hurts so bad

It feels so normal

But hurts so bad

Hurts so bad

Hurts so bad