Untitled Song

"If I Don't Wake Up Tomorrow"

Don Wizdom

HOOK

Ayah, Aisha, and Lailah

If I don't wake up tomorrow then I've gone to see your brother

Don't forget what's in your hearts

And take care of your mothers

I wasn't always what you needed, wasn't always what I should

But every breath I had I spent trying to make it good

So if I don't wake up tomorrow know I left you all my love

Mohamed hold the door — tell Allah I'm on my way up

VERSE 1 (Ayah)

Ayah I know you probably got questions I can't answer right

Last memory is when I walked into my mother's house that night

I was supposed to see you but I picked you up and held you tight

Your mom took off, I had my rights but I had lost my mind

Just started drinking, getting high — left everything behind

From there it was the bottom, wasn't long before the cuffs

I told myself I'd reach back out but never had the guts

There isn't a single day that passes that I don't think of you

A 21 year old woman now and I watched none of it come true

I can't get those years back and I won't pretend I can

I just need you to know you had a father, not just a broken man

He just broke before he could be what you deserved to see

If you ever hear this song — Ayah, this is me

I'm a fuck up, let me just say that for the record straight

A drug addict who chose the bag over being in your grace

Almost always full of shit, I know how that sounds

I been the reason people left, I been the one that let 'em down

I ain't standing here pretending that I got it all together

I just finally stopped drowning long enough to write this letter

Every promise that I broke is on me, every missed year

Every birthday I wasn't there for — I feel all of that right here

I could make excuses but you've heard enough of those from me

The truth is I was selfish and I let the poison get to me

So if you're hearing this and you still got anger — good, hold it

I just needed you to know before I'm gone I finally owned it

HOOK

(spoken) To the three most precious things God ever made — I love you

If I don't wake up tomorrow then I've gone to see your brother

Don't forget what's in your hearts

And take care of your mothers

I wasn't always what you needed, wasn't always what I could

But every breath that I have left I'm trying to make it what I should

So if I don't wake up tomorrow know I left you all my love

Mohamed hold the door — tell Allah I'm coming up

VERSE 2 (Aisha & Lailah)

Then Aisha came into my world and called me dad

First time in a long time something good came from what I had

Wasn't even mine by blood but I claimed her like she was

Because real fatherhood ain't DNA — it's showing up because

Then Lailah arrived and I looked at her brand new face

Four months old and already putting me in my place

I look at these two girls and I see everything I wasted

Every version of myself I buried, every bottom that I tasted

I ain't cured, I ain't perfect, still fighting every day

But I got two reasons now to make sure that I stay

Katie holding everything together while I find my feet

These girls don't know it yet but they pulled me back from underneath

So Aisha, Lailah — if tomorrow never comes for me

Just know you saved your father before your father could be free

HOOK

(spoken) To the three most precious things God ever made — I love you

If I don't wake up tomorrow then I've gone to see your brother

Don't forget what's in your hearts

And take care of your mothers

I wasn't always what you needed, wasn't always what I could

But every breath that I have left I'm trying to make it what I should

So if I don't wake up tomorrow know I left you all my love

Mohamed hold the door — tell Allah I'm coming up

VERSE 3 (Mohamed)

Mohamed, my son, you didn't even get a year

The system had you and the system didn't keep you here

Suspicious circumstances — that's what the paperwork said

Like they could file away the weight of my firstborn dead

I wasn't there to protect you and that lives in me every night

A father who couldn't reach his son, couldn't even fight

Foster care took everything and nobody answered for shit

I buried that grief in a bag because I couldn't afford it

But the deen taught me you're with Allah in the highest place

Jannah raised you when your father couldn't see your face

So when these girls ask about you I'ma proudly speak your name

Mohamed ibn Abdul Rahim — and on that day we will meet again

And when my time comes and I finally close my eyes

Tell Allah I tried to fix what broke before I died

Save me a place next to you, I got apologies to make

Three daughters and a son — that's the family I'll take

HOOK (final)

Ayah, Aisha, and Lailah

If I don't wake up tomorrow then I've gone to see your brother

Don't forget what's in your hearts

And take care of your mothers

I wasn't always what you needed, wasn't always what I should

But every breath I had I spent trying to make it good

So if I don't wake up tomorrow know I left you all my love

Mohamed hold the door — tell Allah I'm on my way up