Old Rap 5
• Written by Sorcerer
Sorcerer's Notes
I found this in my old rap journal. I wrote it back in October 2024. I removed several lines for being offensive. I was such a dick when I was younger. This isn't a great rap. Some of the lyrics are kinda stupid. That lyric about being better than Dr. Dre was bullshit. Obviously I'm not better than him, I just had a huge ego when I was younger. This is one of the worst in my "Old Rap" series. It doesn't have all that much to say and it's just me bragging about nothing in particular.
This is the first time y'all heard me
I'm here takin’ your musical virginity
This is the best rap ever written
Just ‘cause I'm not straight outta Compton doesn't mean I'm not worth a listen
This is my form of self-expression
Curin’ myself of my own depression and aggression
Workin’ through my problems one f bomb at a time
But you don't fuck me with me, not when I'm in my prime
Yo, alright, yo
Where the killin’ at?
I was promised a rap war not a pussy cat
Try find somethin’ get you all fucked up
When the cops come you get locked up, shot up, rocked up, and stocked up
Hop in the prison shower, wait ‘till you get cocked up
What you lookin’ at me for? Ain't my weed
Act normal and play it cool, follow my lead
This shit ain't what I need
What I need right now is an answer to my prayers
I dropped the damn soap and now I'm not prepared
But I ain't gonna take the fuck
“You're fresh out of bullets and that means you're shit outta luck”
Hip-hop back into your flip-flops
Run away, shoes clacking “clip-clop, clip-clop”
Run off now and don't turn your head
Sooner you turn sooner you end up dead
What you mean? It's the fucking lifestyle
Got the meaning all caught up inside this freestyle
Ain't no fucking reason for you to be so hostile
I'm king of this town, bitch, you're a pedophile
I'm lookin’ for some coke, somethin’ to snort
I no longer get my kicks from your girl stickin’ her hand down my shorts
I'll tie you to this chair, gas you and burn you
I'll laugh watchin’ you freeze to death from hypothermia
Your girl's a hoe, you got nowhere to go
Jump off a fucking bridge and kill yourself, yo
Face my RIDICULE, you're so tiny
Bitch, you're MINISCULE
I'mma bring my fucking AK inside your SCHOOL
So don't piss me off, don't you be silly
I'mma fuck you so hard they'll call me P Diddy
Never been called that BEFORE, that's FOR SURE
But I've been called every slur in the universe
Bunch of vultures, I wish your dads had done us all a favour and worn some rubbers
Would've saved me a lot of ass whoopings
But now I'm writing shit about you, see what I'm cooking
I don't really care if you think I'm explicit
I'm out here rappin’ like I'm Xzibit
And I'm easy to follow, I got a straight style
I'm what happens when you show a white guy 8 Mile
And I'm a rapper who gets in trouble every time I open my lid
Yet you people allow P Diddy to fuck kids
TO ME, that sounds like HYPOCRISY
Lucky FOR ME, this shit ain't a DEMOCRACY
So I can say what I want when I want and it's cool
So I'mma insult you to your face and have you feelin’ like a fool
What you mean? It's the fucking lifestyle
Got the meaning all caught up inside this freestyle
Ain't no fucking reason for you to be so hostile
I'm king of this town, bitch, you're a pedophile
I'mma do for rappin’ what Psycho did for showers
Most horrific thing since they hit the second tower
What a SURPRISE, I'm not a nice GUY
What do you expect when I call myself MR. SUICIDE?
Open WIDE, I'll knock your fucking TOOTH OUT
You look like a GUY from TWO THOUSAND and FIVE
I'm bout to take you for a ride
Tonight's the night that Liam Payne died
Take your time, put your feelings into rhyme
I'm on the upward climb, I'm getting outta the grime
I'm just like lemon and lime, and I'll switch you up on a dime
And now I'm in my prime, it'd be a crime
If I didn't put my best foot forward
It'd be so awkward
And I'd feel so tortured
‘Cause I got the ability to be Dr. Dre
And I can be king of the world some day
Maybe when I'm old and grey
I'll look back and say
“I'm better than him anyway”
I'm the best rapper of today
And I'm doin’ OK
I'm the next N.W.A.
And you can be JFK
