Oblivious

I hate these brain-dead, mouth-breathing simpletons

Who somehow manage to survive despite having the cognitive

Ability of a concussed goldfish, intelligence is something these retards don’t have

Staring blankly at a cash register like it’s an ancient alien artifact

They ask the dumbest possible questions and then look shocked when

When reality slaps them in the face, they repeat nonsense

They saw on social media like it’s gospel facts

All while being completely oblivious to the truth, which is that

They’re an embarrassment to evolution

If common sense were a currency, these morons would be flat broke

A cardboard box under a bridge would be their home

While they try to figure out how to tie their own shoelaces

And then there are the spineless, ambitionless slugs, I hate them

They contribute absolutely nothing to society while whining

About how life is so hard, these parasites think they have the rights to

The whole world while doing the bare minimum

Expecting success to fall into their laps and be gifted to them

From the universe, they mope around and complain

About their bad luck, when the only bad luck their lives contain

Is being born with the work ethic of a door

They refuse to put in the effort but demand all the rewards

Making excuses instead of taking action

These human sloths are the reason society has to

Constantly pick up the slack, and frankly

If they disappeared into a void of their own mediocrity

The world would be better off, and let’s talk about the slobs that

Think personal responsibility is an optional concept

These self-inflicted blimps waddle around blaming genetics

Fast food, and the universe itself, when in reality they eat three breakfasts

They expect the rest of the world to accommodate their poor choices

Bigger seats, special privileges, it’s so annoying

They keep inhaling calories like black holes

Meanwhile, the rest of us have to pretend it’s body positivity goals

Instead of what it really is, a complete and utter refusal

To take care of oneself, it’s not about looks, it’s about being too big

Grab your sides and pinch them, shake your fat

Poke your stomach and sides, I’m surprised you can sit in my lap

Pat your stomach, grab the underside of your belly down low

Then pinch it again, this time squeezing and not letting go

Grab your sides and squeeze them, pat your jiggly fatty back

Hands go to your belly again and shake it hard and fast

You’re so weak, you can barely move

Grab a fold of belly fat on your sides, pull it, and pinch it too

God you’re pathetic, shake it again, pinch it and smack it

Grab it and squeeze it hard, jiggle it, grab your flabby flappy

Arm and turn it around, inspecting it, pull on it again

You’re like a slab of fat with muscles, that’s it

Grab your fat flab on the inside of your stomach

What is this, it’s so fat and flubby

Pinch it again and shake it, wow look at you jiggle

You should be ashamed of yourself, grab your back fat and shake it

Shove your belly over the band of your pants, you’re overhanging

Pinch your roll of back fat, do you even feel your back fat, fatty

Grab it and shake it again, do you feel it flapping

Around when you walk, grab a handful of it and pinches it hard

I hate this flab on you, grab your stomach again, oh my god

Why the hell do you even let yourself gain so much weight

Shake your stomach and pinch your love handle again, I blame

You for letting yourself get this fat, grab more of your fat and jiggle it

Grab your arm and inspect your fat flabby arms and squeeze your limbs

Poke your sides and belly making it jiggle, look at you jiggling

Grab your rolls again, you’ve got so much fat it’s so embarrassing

Grab your wrists and hold them tightly

Stand up and grab your love handles again violently

Can you even stand properly, pinch your chin and sides of your face

Your face is getting fatter too, just like every other place

Are you going to cry, it’s not my fault you’re a fatty

Hold your head back by your hair and continue to hold your love handles

This fat is so disgusting, you’ve let yourself go so much

Continue grabbing you by the back and shake it and pull it up

Look at you jiggle around, sit in front of you and grab your legs by

The thighs and squeeze the fat, all this fat in just your thighs

It’s like a shelf, continue to grab your back fat

This back fat is so disgusting, you let yourself go so bad