Ballad of A Young Nerd

giga hit up my show and people had shit to say,

had me question myself and possibly a throwaway

atlantian said some rude remarks, this is all I got, tryna my best to not to be in a feud,

my anger mode went off and felt apart and discontinued

gay accusations, hard-ass feedback, i'm not takin seriously,

every day, someone talking down to me frequently

my dreams are stupid, life is pointless, people said this to me,

low views, close to failure, society broken down, lose interest,

a broken relationship, am I facade or pillar of opportunity,

who do I turn too, there's no sense of community

 

october 1st, forgot this place exists, covid hits, overall analysis, music is a domination, while I was working, folks intoxication

pop was my filter, after some time was spent, had to reconsider, rap was a full job, got to be familar

While his fiends for cream well exceeded the dream she once lived for

I was the nerd of the town and i was low on cholesterol, no one gave a fuck about me, lost all of my control

This a little tune to keep you motivated and inspired, according to dolly, the world was on fire

If you see a bad bitch in the passenger seat

Rap-a-plenty, spank a girl, then she turn the other cheek

You're a nerd. all you talk about is green lantern and superman, job application, fit the description, roll out the congratulations

I'm grand theft auto, racketeering, larceny, conspiracy, murder one

Your body's saying things i ain't never heard, ill thoughts with a quick verse,

That barrel longer than a word with 10 letters

back then, dua lipa was my favorite star, while Eminem was the main avatar

i woke up just waiting for someone to like me, middle finger to the ground, like america, we ain't free

mass-messaged all these peeps to check me out, 2 hours later, don't talk to him, he's a spam, call the exterminator

technically I had 8 albums, 3 hidden from the public, was ashamed of all my past shit, limited and unfortunate

my old songs suck ass, be honest, they are worst than jesy when she went solo, little mix wrote better, then main goal: perfectionist

is this the end, how will I move on, am i cursed to make crappy songs, no one likes me, i'll kill myself, no one will miss me

i was naive, didn't realize, how hard life is us sometimes, sometimes turns to all the time, economy flattens, happiness is the real prize

made a big deal for all my discography, all that depression, almost failed geography

school was a bitch, why would I invest, when clicking on RapPad, got nothing but disrespect

i could cry, but fuck a nigga, like being bitten by a anaconda, the aftermath get better, woke up and start up again, fuck all people, be my own best friend

 

i got to the books, on the edge was my real effort, people commented, good job, beat the limit, accepted, because it was my first time, I might've have over-selled it

based on a poem, I got creative, had to be positive and innovated, from a true story, my life really sucked, had no protection, no territory

the light is coming, got a better better, had a sense of improvement, went on to be independent, one day being the champion

had friend groups, all that looked like me, we thought we were baddies, went on a team, changed my name and my reputation got lower, went from 10 to 0, rollercoaster

battled 2 people, kept being asked, would you do it some more, sounds like a bore

recording music was a karma's a bitch, it became harder to micromanage, trying over and over again, drew happiness back, had to quit on track

my podcast started it in august of that year, my identity is identified, coast is clear, had views up to bazooka, sheldon said bazinga,

everyone wanted to be on it, found time but still a limit, the site had a show of their own, it was a battle of which to belong, song versus song

my mic was horrible, promotion was a chore, xttasy barely showed up, despite being intelligent, had to do everything myself, put everyone else on a lower shelf

In some fucking yellow skinnies looking like a fucking faggot, kind of rapper that can make my repertory look like a ballad

after a little of life living, livin life right, got me solidified, people saw me a writer, final, individual, not a child

grew up a bit, let go of that past shit, welcome back all that fun, whatever happened, it was a one and done

got more connections, just went to enjoy what I wrote, quit that popularity obessions

as time went on, so did me, thank you, what's next just came to me, the vision, the reality

growing is part of life, mental health is a topic to prioritize, a couple of hits, 1200 props, counting and counting, success never stops

 

accepted all the advice I received, used to make me peeved, through all the trials and tribulations, let all anger released

full circle gives meaning, living is not easy, causes a sting, but everyone could use a help, no reason to disconnect

looking back at all of this, maybe it was worth it, let all that shit come in, look in the scope, my people still a target

Now i was dreaming bout a deal at the age of thirteen

My life story ain't science fiction it's a struggle between

All i need is the notepad, had all the feelings from the inside out, made me sad

You changed my views, all thanks to you, the people who cared, part of my journey, you are part of the joy I love to share

I done put a stop to that, threw my first punch, end of first act, the play is almost over

clover doesn't give you good luck, through hard work, you can make it by yourself

gemtric, 80hd, jason bryan, bellavdear, gk-trill, lee writes, citric_canv4s, shapeshift, lil_chip, person, sir-real

thejuvenile, lilcj18, jayx, icee, psychopuppet, 0v3rl0rd, rugged27, skyl, SAPPE_OG_blizzardc,

The_Burning_Rage, nathaniel, neo-arno, maverick, juicyjobajaba, stormtheartonist, stormowens, lioncub, averagejoe

to all the deleted accounts, thank you for serving, that's what counts, to all I couldn't list, all who talked to me, I appreciate it

i got to give feedback to 100s of songs, 5 stars all around all day long, i'm kidding, but seriously

the sound of music, the hate u give, roll bounce, sister act, all the music movies got me going

instead of overflowing, decomposing, got life purpose, not motherfucking

got 4 years experience as a podcast host, no longer a ghost, maverick called me a legend, lil chip is a favorite

at the end of the day, we arent the same, difference is what rules over us

same time though, similar traits, all wants something more, that's great

money is a tug, look at the state, houston for example, never underestimate, rain's a bitch but the environment is crucial

we piggyback off of each other, that's cool, we have no rules,

my writing doesn't define me, imma always do that, didn't expect to have 500 followers, opposites attract

frat gave a trophy, I thank my mom, for what she has always done,

my siblings, my entire family, for being there for me, always, sounds corny, please kill yourself

how can hate drive you, go be by yourself, I'm here to play, I'm here to stay, fuck all of you, yes i'm gay,

did ya hear that, yes i'm gay, and i'm going to stay that way, if you accused me, you were right, though you fuckin suck and you are uptight

under 25, age will be revealed, no i'm not a slut, no sex appeal, this is all what you're getting, ive gotten real

i won't apologize for speaking my truth, according to the bible, i'm just like ruth

a child of god, who loves and saves me, appreciates me, and now i'm free

never forget what you do, love yourself, remember who you are, superstar, throw away the alcohol

i've never gotten the chance to be me, now take the advice, use it freely, i say bye for now but ill be back,

never question what's meant for you, stay on track, write and write, never drop

Hypochondriac Aphrodisiac Kleptomaniac Egomaniac Nymphomaniac Hemophiliac Megalomaniac

trying to prove a point, now you've heard from me, celebrate yourself, make some noise, don't disappoint