MY WHOLE LIFE IN A NUTSHELL

I grew up in Tokyo, my mama died

 

My daddy went to jail and did suicide

 

My sister went 6 feet deep

 

Got her head cut off by somebody named Steve

 

I don't know any relatives

 

Broken, my POV is negative, people calling me sensitive

 

Calling me irrelevant, everybody's competitive

 

All I see is skeletons, still developing

 

All my friends were pretend

 

And inside they wanted me dead

 

These bitches got rumors widespread

 

That's why I hate my school and why I say threats

 

Gettin' into detention, this is my life

 

Broken down so many times

 

I was loved by my family till my sister died

 

And my dad went insane and killed my mother/wife

 

Oh, shots fired, beer bottles broken

 

Glass stuck in her head, damn, she was golden

 

I don't even want my rollie

 

I just want my mama, she was holy

 

Now I'm sittin' here, melancholy

 

And I swear, I'm dying slowly

 

Oh, I'm so damn lonely

 

All these hoes so nosy

 

Oh, tryna steal my trophy

 

Tryna get cozy, thinking of my mom and my homie

 

When my friends die, bitches know me

 

Just show me, show me

 

Broken-hearted, bitch you owe me

 

Hel is below me

 

Red eyes like pepperoni

 

Looking in the mirror, idiots slow me

 

Bunch of assholes, need some lunch

 

Ima land a punch

 

Munch munch, crunch crunch

 

Wearin' grunge grunge

 

Ooh, ooh, goth

 

Bitches got blood clots

 

Fixing it all, got a blood cloth

 

Need my mom back, when my dad and my mom fought

 

My daddy would boycott

 

And then they'd say they forgot

 

It would happen again and my daddy would pull out a glock

 

And threaten to fire 2 shots

 

I'd run to my room and lock the door a lot

 

I'd open the window as I was taught

 

My daddy had issues and the worser it got

 

The worser his mental health became, I had these bad thoughts

 

Worried bout my mom mom

 

Broken hearted, wanted to plant a bomb

 

I wanted to kill my dad but I had to stay calm

 

I tried to fix it all, my palm was sweaty

 

And I had a few pennies

 

And I felt so empty

 

I felt like my dad was deadly

 

I should've trusted my gut already

 

And my dad used to be so friendly

 

Now he's dead, he was so messy

 

His head was all over the place, blood everywhere like confetti

 

He had a machete

 

I was scared, super scared, scarred and broken, leading to no where

 

Following the light, leading me out of this depression cave

 

Ooh, tried to behave

 

Had to cook my own shit in the microwave

 

Had to learn to walk by myself, when somebody fucked up, I haven't forgave

 

'em, cuz I swear this is a shock wave

 

Had to learn to cook and shave

 

Had to learn to get dressed and have time saved

 

Had to learn to shower do my hair and my momma was in her grave

 

And I was brave but I tried to move on

 

I thought about my mom all day long

 

My guts were right and I was wrong

 

Now I'm broken and I shoulda listened to my guts all along

 

And now I'm singing this song

 

Broken hearted, I still stay strong

 

But where do I belong?

 

Then my dad died in jail and I was on the streets

 

Raised up enough money to get something to eat

 

One day a fucking week

 

Where would I sleep?

On the cold floor, I'd cry and scream

 

I found somebody who cared for me

 

He treated me well and was always there for me

 

I'd get bullied behind the scenes

 

Nobody would believe me

 

Everybody thought the bullies were so sweet

 

And I was an attention seeker who wanted attention to seek

 

I wasn't lying though, as you can see

 

And nobody wanted to be me

 

And he gave me a bed and I didn't have to sleep on concrete

 

I wouldn't get beaten and I'd have more than wheat

 

I'd have everything I would need

 

And I felt elite

 

And I had bed sheets

 

I had things to eat

 

I had socks and shoes for my feet

 

Shirts and a room and heat

 

I would have new clothes and meat

 

I'd have a real person who made my life complete

 

Met a girl who'd then be my wife

 

I was suicidal and wanted to commit suicide

 

She had to hide

 

All the fucking knives

 

I'd try to drink bleach and take my life

 

Tried to hang myself every time

 

I'd fail but never give up cuz I wasn't fine

 

Acting alright, fake smile, oh, I wanted to die

 

My mom was in my mind

 

All fucking day I'd cry

 

My then-wife would hold me tight

 

I'd try and try

 

To fucking die

 

I loved reading creepy things, it would keep me alive

 

It kept me satisfied

 

To my surprise, I realized

 

That I really like

 

These stories, am I right?

 

So I said, "I might write one that's mine"

 

But I decided not to until I was older and not nine

 

I still haven't smiled wide

 

My then-wife was my guide

 

I would put my depression aside

 

But it would always come back to bite

 

And I took my then-wife's advice

 

I cut off the fakies and put them behind

 

My then-wife was always by my side

 

We was young, trying to survive

 

God was there for me and we had a wild ride

 

Soon my then-wife was my sunshine

 

I felt good, felt like I was in paradise

 

I'd never let her go nor say goodbye

 

I'd always apologize

 

I wanted to do homicide

 

Cuz everybody lied

 

I knew this was my demise

 

I felt paralyzed

 

Had no valentine

 

But I got one which was my then-wife

 

I'm still in the same place I used to reside

 

My feelings I tried to hide

 

All these fakies are parasites

 

I'm strong like a samurai

 

The fakies did genocide

 

I got married, with a baby on the way

 

Felt good every single day

 

Made a few friends on the way

 

Ready to become a father hey hey

 

Gonna be a good dad to my kid

 

And ain't listen to the fakies bullshit

 

I felt good, them fakies died quick

 

I love my family, my friends, and my wife, my kid, and everybody who's nice

 

I felt good, I loved my life

 

Feeling good every day every night