Battles  P00nM4sta vs Gumshoe

RULES

must involve Viking warfare or Viking references

Max of 18 lines

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Gumshoe won this battle!

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CHALLENGER'S RAP

  • I be coming at your ass with a fucking battleaxe,
  • cut to the fucking chase, cuz it's a fucking battle, mac!
  • plow yo ass down like i'm a titan,
  • god of tricks, your clan is dicks, I live to spite them,
  • they call me loki,
  • but I don't roll low-key,
  • I come in like a trireme and eat yo ass like gnocchi.
  • uh
  • my axe is so fuckin sharp,
  • i'll dig a hole in the beach, throw you in like a rotting shark
  • but not before I slice ya, dice ya,
  • they call me mr. twister, cuz I'll spin and fuck ya twice, guy
  • I discovered your weakness like newfoundland
  • as I wave off your head off with a wave of my hand
  • leading the charge, barge into Valhalla
  • and knock yo ass down cuz i'm a fuckin balla.
  • the fuck you gonna do? can keep me from coming thru
  • my sword is sharp, I been studying the wu.

DEFENDER'S RAP

  • I'm a man well feared for his bearded might
  • Drink a stein of mead and proceed to fight
  • If I got my lids open then I'm swinging the right
  • Bringin' down my axe, taxin anglo-saxon's their life
  • I'll ride up upon on a long ship with my long dick
  • Man, I aint afraid of you - seen more talent in a long shit
  • Maintain an inner flame, that's berserker rage
  • I'm horny- rape your family, no matter the age
  • Give me the gold scum, peasant bring me the swag
  • Or your baby boy's head goes in the bag man i hate to brag
  • I got that life man it's all about the pillage
  • I must have fucked and stolen in near every English village
  • I'd only ever 'bale-out' with ocean water spillage
  • And I'll fuck skulls til I'm dead, glorified and real rich
  • but for me its fuck kill fuck with a drizzle of mead
  • I fuckin' braid my beard while im sprayin' my seed
  • I'll ride the lightening, fuck it I'll challenge a storm
  • Just to hold your wifey's pussy down and fuck her 'til I'm Thor

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