64 Steps To Freedom

*Revised*

 

Lyrics:

 

Lately i'm too caught up in my life,

i have made some big decisions that i'm realizing aren't right

but now i'm stuck here with my choices and this battle that i fight

and all these overwhelming thoughts that I've been thinking of at night

 

seeming just like everyone I've ever loved was a mistake

I was giving them my all and never wondered what's at stake

but they always break my heart until there's no heart left to break

tell me whats the point of love when all the love you get is fake

 

I have this empty pit inside me i can never fill

I go and see my doctor but they just prescribe me pills

need a new beginning get away from what is real

because i don't see a future living this way that i feel

 

i'm always feeling as though I am stuck behind a wall

cause I am not the guy to go and try and get them all

i cannot try to love cause i'm supposed to be involved

and I know it isn't fair to either one of us at all

 

I've had so many chances to go live a different life

and I didn't take them now i'm feeling like I paid the price

and people always hate on me because I live a lie

but i'd like to see you where I am and tell me what it's like

 

hating that I'm feeling so depressed

ive been running out of money but the moneys not the stress

lord i hear you're taking people can you make sure I am next

cause i cannot seem to deal with all my problems that contest

and all the shit that I regret

 

know that I am blessed and at the same time I am cursed

cause I know I have the best, but I feel i deserve worse

god I'm hoping its a test, gotta show you what I'm worth

cause I think that I'm obsessed with the feeling of this hurt

 

This was never in the plan, always said that you wont break me

but now all if feel is breaking, i just do not understand

and do not start to hate me, cause i'm kinda missing Amy

With the way she'd drive me crazy, and the way she held me hand

 

And how she would drive me crazy and the way she held my hand

 

its me myself and i until the day I die

someone shed some light, cause i live in night, all i see is fright

cannot catch a vibe even i tried, barely go outside, all i do is hide

i'm in need of pride show me what its like

tired of the fight i don't like to lie when i write that i like my life

i don't need to thrive, all i do is strive just to feel alive

always sympathize as she criticize, they all say it's not alright, so

 

when you tell me to go, it is inevitable

one day i'm closing the door and i am not coming home

i'm gonna face the unknown and do it all on my own

and i'm just hoping you know that I am better alone

 

like what the fuck is the point

when to you my heart is a toy

and it is too hard to avoid

I feel like i'm fucking destroyed

 

and i have been losing my voice

I know there is always a choice

but every choice to rejoice

will just lead to more disappoint

 

lets recap I retract ill be back to stay

the feedback i need that to relax today

they feed at my kneecap to see how I react

they me feel detached and push me to relapse

 

I've cut ties with fiends that don't care if I'm safe

3 years now have elapsed still don't feel okay

i'm thinking it's me that has issues to stay

cause the feeling of regret is coming my way

 

i'm all for the pain as long as there's something to gain

i find with you and I together all I am is afraid

when you go grabbing a blade and put it right to your vein

i do not think you understand what that shit does to my brain

 

when you go loving with praise, and then your mood sudden fades

you go from talking mistakes to up and dropping grenades

and I don't got what it takes, cause I will not be insane

so you should stop and regain all of your thoughts to be changed